Big signatures in emails and forums are stupid and annoying
September 28th, 2007Below is the signature added to outgoing mail I assume to every message sent out of (and probably within) JP Morgan. It is huge. Often, this message is longer than the message itself.
If you have ever received an email from someone working at a company, then you understand the confidentiality statement. If this message isn’t for you, then delete it. Duh. This appendage adds no legal force, it does nothing but annoy. You do not need to receive it from every single person who ever emails you.
If you have ever emailed anyone in a financial institution, then it is again obvious that their message about going to get lunch is not an offer or solicitation to buy Google. I don’t need to see this eyesore every single time from everybody I email.
Also bad are massive signatures that literally write out the person’s home address at the bottom of every single email. I don’t need to know your home address every single time I talk to you. Since the signature is already so long, the person adds random quotes or nonsensical statements like “sortir en Pantoufles” etc. If you want people to talk to you about your Pantoufles, then talk about your Pantoufles. Do not clutter your emails with garbage like this hoping for someone to ask you about it.
I want to read your message. I do not want to read or see random garbage over and over.
I propose a solution. Instead of pasting in the whole of the desired signature, simply link to it. So, JP Morgan’s signature might become:
This is not an offer or solicitation: jpmorgan.com/disclaimer
This message is confidential: jpmorgan.com/confidential
A big signature could turn into:
Come to my house: person.com/address
Random fun stuff about me: person.com/me
It’s very short and clear. The massive legal garbage is in the links, easily accessible but not cluttering. The repeated home information and random quotes are shown only to those interested in looking.
Plus, there is the side benefit that you can update the disclaimers, confidentiality statements, addresses, etc. For example, if you hardcode an address or phone number in your signature, it will become old when you move / change numbers. You don’t want someone digging through old email to find a disconnected phone. There might be some legal problems with changing confidentiality statements, but that can be easily resolved with different version urls or the Internet Archive.
I use this signature style.
JP Morgan’s confidentiality statement and disclaimer
*******************************************
This communication is for informational purposes only. It is not intended as an offer or solicitation for the purchase or sale of any financial instrument or as an official confirmation of any transaction. All market prices, data and other information are not warranted as to completeness or accuracy and are subject to change without notice. Any comments or statements made herein do not necessarily reflect those of JPMorgan Chase & Co., its subsidiaries and affiliates. This transmission may contain information that is privileged, confidential, legally privileged, and/or exempt from disclosure under applicable law. If you are not the intended recipient, you are hereby notified that any disclosure, copying, distribution, or use of the information contained herein (including any reliance thereon) is STRICTLY PROHIBITED. Although this transmission and any attachments are believed to be free of any virus or other defect that might affect any computer system into which it is received and opened, it is the responsibility of the recipient to ensure that it is virus free and no responsibility is accepted by JPMorgan Chase & Co., its subsidiaries and affiliates, as applicable, for any loss or damage arising in any way from its use. If you received this transmission in error, please immediately contact the sender and destroy the material in its entirety, whether in electronic or hard copy format. Thank you. Please refer to http://www.jpmorgan.com/pages/disclosures for disclosures relating to UK legal entities.
*******************************************
Person’s big signature
*******************************************
—————————————————————-
* Address: 230 [street] Court, Robbinsville, NJ 08691 *
* Phone: (973)641-[digits] AIM: [PersonAIM] *
* E-mail: [person]@princeton.edu From: sep.dynalias.net *
* Web: http://www.math.princeton.edu/~[person]/ *
—————————————————————-
I am not a physics major. I am not a physics major. I will never be a physics
major. I never will want to be a physics major. I can never be a physics
major. ~Daniel Jonathan Peng
Sortir en Pantoufles: up 292 days, 13:04
********************************************
April 7th, 2008 at 5:07 am
I see that crap all the time: “This message is for information purposes only.”
What the hell is a message for if it’s not to provide information? Ridiculous.